“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” ~ Jim Rohn

Who are the 5 people in your inner circle?

Do they encourage, inspire and lift you up?

Or are they always complaining, criticizing, creating drama, and vomiting negativity?

We all have those people in our lives that we love dearly, but they drain us. Being an intuitive, I am heavily impacted by negative people and I’ve had to learn how to set healthy boundaries and in some cases, distance myself. How can you still love on those people, but also remain in integrity and protect yourself? Is it time to let them go? These are serious questions to ponder, because I guarantee they are having an impact on your life whether you realize it or not. It’s a tough call, but one only you can make.

Who should we surround ourselves with? Here are some of my essential must-haves:

• People with a growth mindset (if you haven’t read Mindset by Carol Dweck, read it now!)
• People who challenge me. In order to evolve as humans, we need people to challenge our thinking and bring new perspectives to light. I am forever the student and learning at all times. 
• Do they push me to reach my goals? Are they supportive AND holding me accountable?
• A mentor/coach! Someone who is ahead of me on the path, they have reached the goals I am striving for and will share their lessons from their journey. “A smart person learns from their mistakes, a wise person learns from the mistakes of others.” ~ Unknown
• People who share the same value system. (This is also extremely important when choosing a mentor/coach.)
• Do they cultivate and nurture the relationship? Are they there to celebrate the good times and hold space for you when it’s bad? Do they give and receive?

There’s also a great article about this in Success Magazine. It says these are the five friends you need in your inner circle:

• A dreamer will help you dream it.
• A driver will turn dreams into reality.
• A motivator will inspire you every step of the way.
• A supporter will never leave your side, through good and bad times.
• A devil’s advocate will cut through the BS and tell you the real deal.

Take some time this week to sit down and assess your inner circle. Make a pros and cons list or rate them 1-5 based on the suggestions above. Once done, evaluate your inner circle and see where there are gaps or where changes need to be made. As I stated earlier, you may need to let them go, or you may just need to set some healthy boundaries; do what’s best for you.

I also highly recommend A Tribe Called Bliss: Break Through Superficial Friendships, Create Real Connections, Reach Your Highest Potential by Lori Harder. It is a fantastic book that dives head first into female relationships, comparison, competition, isolation and how to find the tribe that was meant for you.

​Here’s to another week of living your life by design, not by default!